The build toys that actually get used

Notes on the build systems that shape our play and why the simplest combinations usually work best.

TLDR: The best build toys are the ones that create a calm space for open ended play. A small set of reliable collections goes a long way. Fewer brands, thoughtful additions and a Huske mat to define the play area make setup easier, play deeper and tidying simpler.

Read time: about 11 minutes

Most play sessions in our house look the same. Someone builds a tower, someone else knocks it down, then the whole thing turns into a prison for a Playmobil pirate who was minding his own business two minutes earlier. The details change, but the rhythm does not. That rhythm is why I am starting this series with the build category.

I will be writing about all the main categories we use, build, role play and little people play, gross motor play, miniatures and figures, crafting and making, soft toys and books. Build comes first because it holds everything else together. Our setup is no different to most homes, it's not groundbreaking, but when it comes to this high consumption, gifting focused time of year it might be helpful to be able to articulate your preferences and explain why or suggest brands that just work.

In my experience, the toys that most parents resent are not the ones they chose themselves, but the remnants and sheer volume of stuff the never asked for. It sounds ungrateful, but it's a huge mental load when it's the wrong fit.

Why build toys come first

Build toys are the world makers. Everything else fits inside them. When my boys take out Duplo or Lego or Connetix, the Playmobil figures appear, the Schleich animals escape again and the Matchbox cars suddenly find a job to do. Build toys give shape to the other categories. They make room for stories rather than telling children what the story should be.

They are also where quality and predictability really matter. A good build system works with your child. When the pieces click and stay stable, the play flows. When they do not, children stop before they start.

This part is not about rules. It is just what has made our days calmer and our play more enjoyable.

We are collectors

I am sharing this mindset because it has helped me think clearly about toys, especially when people ask what to give the boys.

• We think of ourselves as collectors of certain toys, not accumulators of one-off ones. 
  
• I look for systems that connect rather than compete.
• I pay attention to what our childcare settings use. If a KITA or Hort invests in something, it is usually durable and much loved.
• I choose toys that I find easily second hand and can resell or pass on without effort. If plastic stays in long term circularity it bothers me a lot less. 
• I keep the range predictable so the boys do not get overwhelmed before they begin.
• I add small pieces rather than giant sets. They have the biggest impact.
• I notice which toys appeal to both adults and children. Those stay in rotation longest.
• Almost every piece fits inside a shoebox which keeps visual clutter low and stress levels down. Modu, which we do not yet own, is the exception, but it can live under a bed. 

When there are too many unrelated brands, nobody knows where anything belongs. A streamlined roster is not restrictive. It is freeing.

I realised this when my under bed Lego storage pin recently took off on Pinterest. It was not the storage itself people were responding to. I think it was the relief of seeing a system that children can understand and parents do not hate. When there are too many brands in one category, children freeze before they start. A streamlined roster makes it easier for them to set up, to play and to tidy. It also makes gifting easier. When someone asks what the boys might like, I know what exists and what would genuinely be used.

Ultimately any given toy is only as good as your ability to store it easily, or your willingness to look at it every day for years

Duplo

I thought I was finished with Duplo, then it came back. The connectors that link Brio to Duplo go a long way to keeping it relevant long after the toddler years. It is sturdy and forgiving and it still earns its place.

Lego

Lego needs no explanation and is the backbone of the school age years. Almost all of ours is second hand. It mixes with everything and there is endless inspiration available. It also appeals to adults, which keeps it in rotation.

Connetix

Connetix is our magnet tile system of choice. A friend who owns a kids store and stocked two magnetic tile brands recommended Connetix for quality. The tapered edges fit into Duplo which appeals to my modularity loving brain. And the H-pieces of Connetix perfectly fit Brio tracks. 

Safety matters too. This category exploded and not every manufacturer is dependable. I do not want loose magnets anywhere near younger children. I would rather stay with a known brand that has proper testing behind it and can be resold easily.

Next year I will probably add a marble run attachment. Maybe some Connetix Pro pieces before that. Small additions tend to unlock a lot of new play.

This is the category I would point to for gifting because you can never have enough.

Brio

I have had Brio in the house for years. Last Christmas I added two rechargeable trains and the whole set came back to life. This year the boys are getting two red suspension bridges. It is a perfect example of how one or two small pieces can activate a whole box again.

Cuboro

Cuboro is a build toy that appeals to adults and children equally. It is the Swiss brand that has crept into our mix. Visually I love it, because it feels architectural and crafted. It lives on a metal Hay tray on our coffee table and gets moved around during television time. It is one of the few toys where a parent and a child genuinely enjoy building together.

MakeDo

MakeDo arrived last Christmas. It is clever and satisfying but mine were still a bit young at six and four. At seven and five they are closer, but I still feel it belongs to a slightly older phase. I have packed it away for now and I will reintroduce it when they are ready. Some toys need time, not age. With time, we'll be about to spread out a Gallivant mat and paint our cardboard fort or car, maybe this year, let's see. 

Way to play roads

Way to play is a set I have never owned but have always been interested in. It is a good example of why I prefer flexible build systems over fixed backgrounds. A printed road rug tells a child how to play. Movable road pieces let them invent their own path and their own town.

Many of these toys can be used from under one year, especially Connetix and Duplo, and they stay relevant until eight or nine. That is a long lifespan for a toy and a good return on the space it takes up.

Other good options

Clics, Kapla and Modu follow the same philosophy, just at different scales. Bavvic is another Swiss designed open ended build toy I have not tried yet but love the look of. The pieces have a calm, deliberate look and the design feels thoughtful in a way that usually hints at staying power. I suspect it would appeal to adults as much as children, which is almost always a good sign.

What I skip

I skip cheap build sets. They crack, warp and frustrate. Once the pieces stop aligning, the play stops. It is not only about durability. Cheaper sets often include a huge number of random piece types. It sounds generous, but it overwhelms. The better brands keep the toolbox intentionally limited which makes it easier for children to start and to keep going.

I also skip giant pre made Playmobil structures. They take over the room and they cannot be rebuilt. When the boys want a castle or a fort, I borrow one from the Ludothek. The rest of the time they build their own versions with what we already have.

In general the categories I chose don't involve sets where you can be endless looking for a missing piece to be able to use it, or when tidying up. In fact Lego will now ship you individual missing pieces so when they do follow instructions step by step you can fill the gaps.

I generally skip leaning into every new toy that appears. I do love magnets and I am intrigued by Clixo lately. It may end up extending our collection at some point. For Christmas they each have a Lego set in mind, they will get the Brio extension I mentioned and possibly some Connetix Pro. Something they want, something they need. They will be thrilled. Clixo can come later.

Ultimately, I want my children to know how to make their things work for them, not the other way around.

Where Huske fits in

Build play usually means tiles, wheels, tiny accessories and small figures. A Huske mat gives the play space a soft boundary and keeps things visually calm. It makes the whole thing easier to contain and easier to reset at the end of the day.

Build is only the first category in this series, but it is the foundation. If you are choosing toys for Christmas or for the year ahead, a clear mindset and a few strong brands make everything easier. Less clutter, less overwhelm, more space to play.

If you have found a brilliant build toy I have not mentioned, tell me via Instagram or in the comments. I always trust those recommendations the most.

Hope this helps, Kate

Postamble

I know everyone approaches toys differently, and this is simply what has made our own days feel smoother and less chaotic. I am a creative pragmatist at heart and a bit of a homebody, so I really value when our space feels intuitive and calm. This way of organising things has taken a lot of pressure off all of us. If you enjoy this kind of reflection, you can subscribe to the newsletter below. I will be sharing more soon.